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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/20/2022 11:35:49 AM:
Little known fact: Helen Keller led the league in errors every year of her career. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/19/2022 9:04:36 PM:
In single season team records: Doubles 285 Mike Aquilina Season 4 Joe Agostino Season 2 Normally, if a there is a tie, you go alphabetical, but as Mike is both Lord and Master of this site, Joe is put in geographic second place. It doesn't take a Helen Keller to see what's going on. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/19/2022 8:51:48 PM:
From the 'Got Nothing Else to Do Tonight, Mikey' files: The Complete and Mostly Accurate History of Strat-O-Matic as it Pertains to Holbrook, NY in the Latter Part of the Twentieth Century Foreward (sic) Blah, blah . . . (stuff about Dan Falcone and masturbation) . . . On September 29, 1997 But that is another story. A story within the story. A story which a wise man may say, 'has more angles that (sic) a doorknob.' It stinks of 'Iowa' at the beginning, and has an undertaste of Henny Youngman. And it's 'might,' Mike. 'Might' not 'may.' You invite me over for a glass of wine and all of a sudden I'm giving lectures in Livingstone Square near sunset! For free! Seriously, though, I'm just testing the limits of your Message Board parameters. No harm done. P.S. Why have a reverse feature at all? Jesus. Today |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/19/2022 8:20:14 PM:
Found poem, titled: Fuck You, Douche: 7-4 Blacks and Willie Lives Still Mike Aquilina posted the following message 1/22/2021 2:17:59 PM: I think this the complete list of Strato players that have died since we started playing: Hank Aaron, Don Sutton, Phil Niekro, Dick Allen, Joe Morgan Bob Gibson, Lou Brock, Tom Seaver, Bob Watson, Jimmy Wynn and Al Kaline died right before we started. Poor Willie Mays Doesn’t stand a chance Of surviving the season. |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/19/2022 11:39:06 AM:
Mel Queen wonders how many 'swishers' on each roster? And do you have their phone number? |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/16/2022 2:05:56 PM:
Did a review of the rosters. Turns out the streaking Mud Hornets have the least amount of colored players (3) on their roster. Meanwhile, slumping Eunice has the most (11). Guess they're just too lazy to show up when work's afoot, yeah? And don't grin JC-AS (jack ass) because you're close to the bottom. (FYI: Latinos count as half black in these calculations.) |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/16/2022 1:47:02 PM:
Looking at stats for Jesus Christ All-Stars, and Jesus Christ! His top two pitchers, Mel Stottlemyre and Rudy May, make me think of a time when a starter for the late 70s Mets couldn't get an out and Bob Murphy notes, 'Rick Folkers is throwing up in the bullpen.' We're all throwing up, Bob, all of us JC fans. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/15/2022 4:06:02 PM:
With a little editing, the following stubbed toe report tells another story: Black Sox posted the following transaction 12/13/2022 7:24:46 PM: Injury Add: Wine, Bobby (SS). But what if: Injury? Add wine, Bobby (SchutzStaffel). Secret Indian code? Kennedy conspiracy theory? Or clever ruse? You Aryan scum. I see Bobby Wine grabbing his shin and rolling around naked on a World Cup pitch crying, 'Look at me!' Take off the Navy shirt and play, Mike. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/15/2022 3:37:08 PM:
I like to get up in the morning and read the boxscores with my coffee, but this site has no boxscores. I can't even figure out when teams play. Is it safe to say all of you idiots will play whenever you want, no deadline, no up to date stats? That's how the Negro Leagues died my friends; just saying. |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/14/2022 10:35:58 AM:
Mel Queen and Gaylord Perry were seen partying together last night after the Black Sox/Murder Hornets series. Do the math. |
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John Deodato
posted the following message
12/14/2022 8:03:13 AM:
Coach I mean Tony I hear you I try and get him up to the plate anytime I can he’s great. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/13/2022 2:41:37 PM:
Little advice from a 1971 teenager to the GM of the Sharks: Play Ralph Garr in critical moments. Led the league in sacrifice that year. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/13/2022 2:27:38 PM:
The worst pitcher on the Black Sox is named Mel Queen. The Worst. That's a soft name, I think you would agree. And Joe Grzenda bullies him in the locker room after the game. 'Mitch Miller!' he always cries in his Freddie Mercury voice. Ha! |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/13/2022 1:58:58 PM:
The Sharks are growing on me. They eat everything in their path, right? Love the Commissioner, hate the Black Sox that insist on preferred pronouns. (Note to Mike: Get a hitter!) |
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John Deodato
posted the following message
12/12/2022 10:37:44 AM:
Despite that fact that our commissioner has a stuttering problem he is a fair and honest individual, and does the best job that someone with his condition can. With that said the way he handles his line up that’s a sort for another day. Commissioner Aquilina has full support of the entire Sharks organization. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/11/2022 6:14:40 PM:
Even the commissioner stutters. Write me a letter, pal. |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/11/2022 7:41:25 AM:
The problem with the fans is they never played the game. They come on here with their “first time, long time” ramblings and go on to eviscerate the men who are in the trenches everyday. You think it’s easy putting our hearts and souls on the line for 160 games a season? It’s not but we do it because, well I’m sure there’s a reason, it’s just not coming to me at the moment. In any case, “Tony from Sheboygan” stay in your ivory tower and keep wishing you were man enough to roll the dice with your heroes. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/10/2022 6:27:45 PM:
The problem with this league is that everyone is too busy to upload stats. The website itself is drenched in cobwebs. Perhaps Eugene and I should become co-commissioners. You know, for kicks. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/10/2022 6:12:33 PM:
Haiku believer with Dan, John, Frank; while MikeJoe are homecoming queens |
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