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Tony Nun
posted the following message
1/12/2023 10:30:46 AM:
Eggbert's favorite game as a kid was Risk because his ambition was to take over the world and then make everyone his butler. |
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John Deodato
posted the following message
1/6/2023 4:28:51 PM:
Tony I find it odd that you Paul and Eggbert never joined Joe and Louis in playing the game. Could you imagine getting mocked by the Eggman after he comes from behind in the 9th inning with a 2 out 3 run homer. |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
1/2/2023 10:52:24 AM:
In 1963 Charlie Brown was distraught because his favorite baseball player, Joe Shlabotnik, got sent down to the minors. I don’t know if Shlabotnik was a Jew. Sounds like a Polock if you ask me. He’s probably still down on the farm, waiting for another shot at the Show. But I’m not going to make any rash roster changes and call up a Baumann, a Shlabotnik, or a Phelps or two in the hope that they are the magic elixer that’ll turn the Sox’ season around. We already have Bill Gogolewski for that. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/31/2022 2:25:12 PM:
In 1954 Joe Baumann belted 72 homers and averaged .400 for the Roswell, New Mexico, team of the Longhorn League. He never made it to the majors because he was a Jew. I'd suggest the Black Sox bring him up with the hope of adding a little pop to the lineup, but he's been dead since 2005. Maybe the Phelps brothers are available? Offense equals wins, Mike. Put aside your prejudices for the good of team for godsakes. |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/30/2022 6:45:40 AM:
Since winning 7 of 9 I’ve lost 6 of 7. I’m the Knicks of Strato. I’ll have the boys working on their three-point shooting over the New Year. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/29/2022 12:35:27 PM:
More history: Holtsville, NY and Port Jefferson, NY, 1995 With Eugene’s acceptance into the Police Academy he decided to go on sabbatical from the league. This left Dan, Louis, John and Mike to battle it out . . . John drifted to the bottom of the standings but Dan, Mike and Louis were all in position to take first place. When the dust had finally settled all three had identical 85-75 records. Final score Cops: 2, Others: Zero. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/29/2022 12:17:48 PM:
OR-tend (verb). Definition: To post something accidently because the webmaster is too 'busy' (in theory) to put in an editing function. Example: 'I didn't ortend to do that, but I guess this Strato Message Board is a kind of a one-chance-and-you're-out website.' Which is why you have no traffic, Mike. Scrub off the kinky hair and use your brain to think. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/29/2022 12:07:33 PM:
The Black Sox have a 2.53 ERA and a losing record. Maybe they should be called the African-American Sox and kneel during the National Anthem when the bombs bursting in air save the life of your pretentious, whiny hitters! There are heroes, and there are people who smoke cigars and carry a big stick. And of course other people who ortend |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/28/2022 6:40:41 PM:
This sequence suggests a Strawdog: The Jesus Christ All-Stars (12/27) Injury Add: Northrup, Jim Sharks (12/28) Injury Drop: May, Dave The Jesus Christ All-Stars (12/28) ADD: May, Dave DROP: Northrup, Jim HAHAHAHAHA! Strawdog, def.: 'Anything discarded after use.' Wake up, JC, heading to the backstretch, dog! |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/28/2022 6:27:36 PM:
Quarter season update: Sharks are the class of the league and have played 39 games. Everyone else lags behind, GP-wise, hoping Johnny's luck will run out. I mean, why play when the die is not a color to your liking? That BS guy has made up ground on Frank, who might be too tired from planning his parties. Get some sleep! |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/20/2022 1:14:30 PM:
The Black Sox have won 7 of their last 9. We’ll make you eat your words. Then you can tell us what “hack” tastes like. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/20/2022 12:38:48 PM:
Jeneius! Yet you're still in the Second Division. If only you had some good players and a competent GM. That would be cool, too, right? |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/20/2022 12:07:42 PM:
re: message board posting dateline 12/19/2022 8:51:48 PM: Dear Tony, I thought you retired from the editing gig a few months back. Retired, cancelled, tomato, potato. Regardless, please keep in mind that that tome was written in 1997. I was just a babe of 32, a young man who had not been schooled in the conventions of writing for a sophisticated audience. Today I'm older, wiser, and trying my hand at poetry. Here's one I wrote for you: Read Fuck Between the You Lines |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/20/2022 11:48:40 AM:
It's taking me a long time to go through your history. I noticed and remembered that Frank is called Flank. To those other people never considered for the Magnificent Seven, I can say with some conviction that Flank is a cool name for a guy that just is hammered in there, like a beam in the attic, never considered as a foundation. Flankly, Fluck You. Pan es sea, Uhh, dig? Next up: Dan. |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/20/2022 11:35:49 AM:
Little known fact: Helen Keller led the league in errors every year of her career. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/19/2022 9:04:36 PM:
In single season team records: Doubles 285 Mike Aquilina Season 4 Joe Agostino Season 2 Normally, if a there is a tie, you go alphabetical, but as Mike is both Lord and Master of this site, Joe is put in geographic second place. It doesn't take a Helen Keller to see what's going on. |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/19/2022 8:51:48 PM:
From the 'Got Nothing Else to Do Tonight, Mikey' files: The Complete and Mostly Accurate History of Strat-O-Matic as it Pertains to Holbrook, NY in the Latter Part of the Twentieth Century Foreward (sic) Blah, blah . . . (stuff about Dan Falcone and masturbation) . . . On September 29, 1997 But that is another story. A story within the story. A story which a wise man may say, 'has more angles that (sic) a doorknob.' It stinks of 'Iowa' at the beginning, and has an undertaste of Henny Youngman. And it's 'might,' Mike. 'Might' not 'may.' You invite me over for a glass of wine and all of a sudden I'm giving lectures in Livingstone Square near sunset! For free! Seriously, though, I'm just testing the limits of your Message Board parameters. No harm done. P.S. Why have a reverse feature at all? Jesus. Today |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/19/2022 8:20:14 PM:
Found poem, titled: Fuck You, Douche: 7-4 Blacks and Willie Lives Still Mike Aquilina posted the following message 1/22/2021 2:17:59 PM: I think this the complete list of Strato players that have died since we started playing: Hank Aaron, Don Sutton, Phil Niekro, Dick Allen, Joe Morgan Bob Gibson, Lou Brock, Tom Seaver, Bob Watson, Jimmy Wynn and Al Kaline died right before we started. Poor Willie Mays Doesn’t stand a chance Of surviving the season. |
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Mike Aquilina
posted the following message
12/19/2022 11:39:06 AM:
Mel Queen wonders how many 'swishers' on each roster? And do you have their phone number? |
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Tony Nun
posted the following message
12/16/2022 2:05:56 PM:
Did a review of the rosters. Turns out the streaking Mud Hornets have the least amount of colored players (3) on their roster. Meanwhile, slumping Eunice has the most (11). Guess they're just too lazy to show up when work's afoot, yeah? And don't grin JC-AS (jack ass) because you're close to the bottom. (FYI: Latinos count as half black in these calculations.) |
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